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Tremendously Intriguing Topical Subjects - 5.24.24

It’s news. It’s sports. It’s commentary on weird shit from around the internet.


It’s Tremendously Intriguing Topical Subjects, our weekly digest of curated links designed to keep you abreast of very important news!


We will deliver T.I.T.S. (a coincidental acronym) to your inbox every Friday if you subscribe to our blog!

 
Very Important News!

The Official Start of Sundress Season Has Arrived



I probably don't need to tell you this, given that such information is common knowledge, but the official start of Sundress Season each year occurs on the first Saturday after the Milk Moon. Such has been the case since our holy forefathers at the Church of the Big Mommy Milkers established this date for time immemorial.


Church Big Mommy Milkers

Those of you who have followed Flappr for any period will know that we're big fans of Sundresses. We've written blogs about sundresses, made videos about sundresses, and now produced the official theme song of Sundress Season. Some might say that we are pioneers in restoring Sundresses to their rightful place on the pantheon of sexy, but practical, warm-weather attire adored by man and woman alike. Some might say that, but we will not because we're humble.


The Sundress possesses a unique ability to bridge gaps between men and women, through shared appreciation for the garment's breezy elegance and casual charm. The significance of sundress season transcends mere aesthetics; it's a tradition that unites the genders (all two of them). A woman in a sundress represents warmth, liberty, and robust femininity. The Sundress is a symbol of the Western Tradition, encapsulating the spirit of freedom and individuality and to deny its importance is to reject the bounty of your cultural inheritance.



So, my fellow men and women of the West, go forth and celebrate the dawn of Sundress Season this weekend. For if not you, then who? And if not now, then when? Ladies, throw on a sundress for that Memorial Day BBQ. Fellas, encourage your wives to put on that mint green number she's had stored away all winter.


Tis the season, after all.


Brett Cooper: is a Sundress Nationalist



You know, Brett, a shoutout to your conservative brethren would've been the queenly thing to do here . . . You know, the little bird gang who penned the essay and produced the acclaimed video on the very trend you've now adopted. It's not like a small, but very high quality, production house like Flappr could use help from a streamer with a huge audience or anything! Nah, we'll survive without a boost of much-deserved notoriety for our documentaries! No, No, give attention to random communist TikTok influencers! They need it more! That's good for conservatism!


Oh well, no big deal. Her producers probably just didn't know we existed!


Sundress Season has arrived and that's the real story here! We're just happy that Brett has become and avowed Sundress Nationalist! Are we upset? During this enchanting season? Impossible! We've tried; it just doesn't stick. However, we cannot guarantee that this oversight won't tip the scales against Blouse Bunny Brett's run for the 2024 IBTC Division Title - which is troubling after we awarded her an honorable mention for Rookie of the Year in 2023 last year.



Shucks. She seemed like a moderately-sized-shoe-in for the IBTC Division Crown.


Nancy Mace: has big breasts; people notice


Nancy Mace Big Boobs

Nancy Mace, representative for South Carolina's 1st congressional district, posted photos of herself and Speaker of the House, Mike Johnson to Twitter on Sunday evening. The fairly non-descript photos, depicting two colleagues standing in an office, caused quite a stir, however, because Nancy Mace has hearty, healthy, and heavy female human breasts. She does. She's very gifted in that respect.


For some who take issue with Mace's brand of purple politics, those Beltway Button Busters might be her most redeeming qualities (not me, I respect women). Regardless, anytime Ms. Mace posts a photo of herself wearing a remotely form-fitting outfit - people go crazy. In fact, in the days that follow whenever Mace posts new photos on social media, Flappr.net sees increased internet traffic because perverts take to Google and search the phrase "nancy mace boobs". And when such perverts do inevitably search for that phrase, they inevitably come across Flappr's 2023 Milkers Of The Year Award blog, for which Ms. Mace took home the Mommy Milky Division crown.


This latest full-bodied photographic foray was no different. Don't believe me? Let's dive into the data. On May 18th, the day before Mace's social media post, Flappr received approximately 400 impressions for the search term "nancy mace boobs". That number rose to 1,500 impressions on May 19th and 2,900 on May 20th - a 625% increase over two days.


Nancy Mace Bikini

Go and test this for yourself. Go search "nancy mace boobs" or "nancy mace tits" in google and you'll find Flappr at or near the top (and while you're there click on our link to help our SEO!) The Macey Milker Effect is real and it's spectacular.


On a human note, isn't this data funny? Data reveals weird and humorous truths of the human condition. Strip away all the politics and, at the end of the day, Nancy Mace is a pretty lady and people want to see more of her. That's all. Humans just being big, dumb, horny animals. There's beauty in that.




Indeed, inflation is skyrocketing, millions are facing famine, and wars are brewing chaos. Yet, amidst these global challenges, we find a tale of personal struggle that resonates just as deeply – the saga of a sexy fitness instructor battling the trolls of Instagram over photos of herself wearing a miniskirt.


Emily, a fitness sensation with a whopping 2 million Instagram disciples, shared snapshots of herself, accompanied by a heartfelt confession in the caption about her retreat in the shadows, all due to the fear of "offending people". However, Ms. Emily is swapping timidity for tenacity, declaring her choice to be "daring enough to bare her soul" and to unearth her "authentic connection and might." She ended the post with an inspiring plea to her followers, encouraging them to "step into your arena, embrace your journey, and let your courage shine."


Again, she wrote all of this in response to trolls making negative comments about her wearing miniskirts. Some might say her statement was a bit overwrought, but I say it was captivating, fascinating, and a triumph of the human spirit. Never give communist, miniskirt-hating, trolls an inch. Good for you, Emily.



yoga pants fart

Dammit, Carol, these nocturnal emissions are unacceptable. You just cannot fart in bed, even if it's involuntary. This applies to men and women. Do not soil the sanctity of your marital bed with a thunderous symphony of sleepy time flatulence.


Oh, the humanity! Have you no decency, Carol?!


I've watched my wife give birth on several occasions, witnessing unspeakable horrors ooze out of her nether regions, and I still couldn't wait to have sex with her again (after she was medically cleared, of course). But if she ripped a fart so noxious that it kept me from sleeping . . . I think I'd have to file for divorce. There is just no coming back from that breach of trust. If you have to fart in bed, excuse yourself to the bathroom. If you fart during your sleep, change your diet. If neither of those things works, then stick a cork up your ass.


The same applies to men as well. Yes, there may be a time and place for the occasional Dutch Oven - but tis only a cruel prank, not a way of life. Do not lower your hygienic standards around your wife. Save farts for time spent with the fellas, where producing the loudest, stinkiest, or most primal rectal vapors correlates with prime social status within a friend group. A dude who can perform a trombone solo with his cheeks is a king among men, but a dude who does it in bed with his wife is just fucking gross.


We live in a society, dammit.


 
Regular News!



I am a (somewhat) good Catholic boy. I don't want to "hate" anybody. But these fucking people . . . they make it so difficult to remain true to my values. This "insurrectionist flag" narrative is the gayest, flimsiest, most reprehensible DNC-CNN-MSNBC media ploy I've seen in the past decade.


The "insurrectionist flag" is actually the "Appeal to Heaven" flag, also known as the Pine Tree Flag, and it traces back to the American Revolution. It was originally commissioned by Colonel Joseph Reed, who served as the personal secretary to George Washington. The flag was adopted on October 21, 1775, and became the official Massachusetts Navy flag in 1776.


The flag has a rich history, having flown on several military ships dating back to 1775. It symbolizes the American colonies' plea for help from a higher power to save them from the rule of England. The pine tree was chosen as a symbol due to its significance in colonial New England and its connection to the white pine trade, which was vital to the British Navy.


Yes, the "Appeal to Heaven" flag was carried by some of the Jan. 6 Capitol rioters (along with a shitload of other flags, including California's Bear Republic Flag). However, its historical roots and original intent remain tied to the American Revolution and the fight for independence. These cunts all know this, but they don't care. They just want to discredit the Supreme Court by any means necessary. Because they're cunts. The media is the enemy of the people.


A reminder that we're somehow less than 6 months away from an election in this very extended remix of 2016. Moreover, despite all that has happened, Donald Trump maintains a non-insignificant lead over animated carcass, Joe Biden.


From here to Election Day, I'll sprinkle in polling data in each blog post. Think of it as a pre-apocalyptic time capsule that we can nostalgically look back on once the shit hits the fan. Cuz buddy, , , some shit is going to hit the fan.



The one in which Robert Stacey McCain shares thoughts on the NY Trump trial:


"The prosecution has not explained how anything alleged against Trump is actually a crime, and if Judge Merchan had any integrity (which he doesn’t), as soon as the prosecution rests, he would issue a directed verdict of acquittal, but he won’t do that, because this is not actually a trial. The evidence and testimony don’t matter, because the outcome was predetermined before the “trial” ever started. This is a political operation organized by the Democratic Party to punish Trump and, if possible, to prevent him from being elected president again."


I strive to remain soberminded and as objective as possible and I'm not as MAGA as some of you might prefer. But this Alvin Bragg case in New York is really, truly, reprehensible. The charges should never have been brought and would not have been brought if the target was anyone other than Donald Trump. Keep in mind that Alvin Bragg is the same DA who instructed prosecutors to avoid seeking jail time for all but the most serious crimes. The same Alvin Bragg who refused to seek felonies charges for robberies unless they involved "a genuine risk of physical harm." The same Alvin Bragg whose policies led to a 26% increase in murder, rape, robbery, assault, burglary, grand larceny, and car thefts. This same Alvin Bragg went out of his way to concoct a legal theory to elevate misdemeanor "falsifying business records" charges to felonies because the statute of limitations on those misdemeanors expired years ago.


The prospect of a Manhattan jury, which voted 86% for Biden in the past election, potentially convicting the current GOP is a real one - I'd wager the possibility of a guilty verdict here is 50/50. I'm cautious about using terms like "show trial," which carry significant historical weight, but what we're witnessing is political lawfare and the retards involved have zero appreciation for the dangerous path they tread.


David Thompson: The Bedlamite Contagion


The one in which David shared a sane conversation for a change:


"I was going along with “trans women are women,” not because I believed it, but because I thought it was the kind thing to do. And I couldn’t see the harm. And [then]… I realised we were supposed to believe that trans women were women. I didn’t think any of us really believed it. I thought we were all just pretending. So when I realised that we were supposed to believe that trans women are women, that’s when I stopped pretending that I believed it…


From the following video, in which Andrew Gold talks with the formidable Mia Hughes, author of The WPATH Files, about pseudoscience, malpractice, and experiments on children."



I watched this and found it to be a captivating and honest discussion on how we got here on the tranny issue - namely, people wanted to be nice, play along and indulge the rhetoric of mentally ill people because they never imagined there would be consequences. I think this is accurate. I think people thought this would die down once the alphabet gang attained some level of tolerance.

Well . . . the path to hell is paved with good intentions. Hopefully, society, namely white women, has learned a lesson and is ready to fight back.



 
Sports News!

NHL Playoffs: The Final Four


Dallas Stars vs Edmonton Oilers (0-0)


The Oilers have the stars, but the Stars are the better team. This Dallas team vanquished the last two Stanley Cup winners (Vegas/Colorado) to get to the Western Conference finals. They have a huge advantage between the pipes. They have HUGE bolt-ons behind the bench.



The Stars SHOULD win this series.


And yet . . . I feel like the Oilers might pull the upset. Connor McDavid is the best professional athlete in the world right now. McDavid will go thermonuclear and dominate a series at some point in his career. He already has 21 points in 12 playoff games (but only 2 goals). For the Oilers to clinch this series, and make their first Stanley Cup Final since 2006, McDavid alongside Leon Draisaitl will need to overpower the Stars.


New York Rangers vs Florida Panthers (Panthers lead 1-0)


The Rangers are very good, but the Panthers are my current pick to win the Stanley Cup. The Ps have the skill, the goalie, the experience, and a horseshoe up their butt right now. To win the Cup, you need 'puck luck', and for whatever reason, the Panthers seem to have all the breaks going their way.


Yes, this is my hockey analysis. Get lucky. That's some next-level punditry.




Jared Goff took Sean McVay and the Rams to the Super Bowl. Then Sean McVay traded Goff (plus draft picks) to Detroit for Matthew Stafford. The Rams, with Stafford, won the Super Bowl the next season. Everybody thought Goff was going to be a seat warmer for the Lions. The media shit all over Goff. Then Goff played well enough in his first year as a Lion to earn a second year. Last year, he led the Lions to within minutes of a Super Bowl. This offseason he got PAID.


Good for Jared Goff. The odds were stacked against him, but he resurrected his career when most QBs in his position would've faded into obscurity. Looking back, the Goff-Stafford trade was incredibly balanced - despite the Rams having won a Super Bowl. Since the trade:


Goff: 24 wins

Stafford: 24 wins


Goff: 66% comp %

Stafford: 66% comp %


Goff: 41 turnovers

Stafford: 41 turnovers


Goff: 78 pass TDs

Stafford: 75 pass TDs


Goff: Sexy SSO

Stafford: Sexy SSO



Trades rarely work out this well for both teams. When you factor in that the Lions used the draft picks from the trade to select Sam LaPorta and Jahmyr Gibbs (among others) - the Lions probably won this trade, despite the Rams winning a Super Bowl with the Rams.



Paige Spiranac Boobs

This photo gives me mixed emotions. Yes, it's the sports influencer eGirl crossover event of the decade, but it feels a bit weird to see them standing next to one another. Like, I know they're both human beings who live and breathe and occupy mass (with Paige's Pontoons occupying more mass) within the same universe - but we always see them in their bubble.


Paige has built a golf influencer empire - she posts golf stuff. Livvy Dunne is a gymnast/college/zoomer icon - she posts that type of stuff. To see Paige and Livvy together feels unnatural for some reason. It's akin to watching Luke Skywalker and Captain Kirk join forces against Agent Smith on the dunes of Arrakis. Each is legendary in their own right, but together? Something feels off.


Listen, I'm not complaining. I'm happy for both Olivia and Paige! Spiranac made the cover of the 60th Anniversary issue! Dunne was featured for the second time! It's cool, but it's just . . . feels off to see them together. That's all I'm saying.


Editor's Note: Fox News wrote this article, which means they are a sm*t blog.




This is Elle Brooke. She's a professional boxer from the UK who earns up to £ 60,000 a month from making porn on the internet. She also says she's passionate about the sweet science of boxing and is continuing to train towards winning a title despite her OnlyFans fortune. Brooke is slated to fight Paige VanZant, who is a trained mixed martial artist, who has fought in the UFC and also has a very successful OnlyFans account.


On some level, I respect that Brooke is taking the sport seriously. You can't step into a ring and willingly take shots to the face unless you have some balls. If Brooke somehow beats a trainer beast like Paige VanZant this weekend, she will have earned a lot of respect. But . . . I do kind of hate that this is where women's sports are heading. I know, I know, I blog about these eGirl sports influencers each week, but they're often retired and have essentially become models due to their careers in the sporting world. Put another way, the eGirl route should exist as an opportunity for female athletes who gained notoriety for their talents on the court/field/ice. Not the other way around.


Does that make sense? Probably not. Oh well. Moving on.



We must investigate the literalness of this BSO headline (for journalistic purposes):


Kayla Simmons big boobs

Yes, that does appear to be "World's Sexiest Volleyball Player", Kayla Simmons, wearing a 'skimpy outfit', and flaunting "massive cleavage'. However, Kayla does not appear to be posing inside of a library. Given the crisp condition of the books pictured and the way they are displayed on the shelves, that's almost certainly a Barnes & Noble bookstore. So, my final rating this week is that this is a very literal, but misleading BSO headline.


It's also curious that Kayla chose to pose with Elon Musk: Tesla, SpaceX, and the Quest for a Fantastic Future, a 2017 biography written by Ashlee Vance. Is Kayla trying to tell us something? In the year 2024, Elon Musk has become a pretty 'controversial' figure. To some (mostly r*tards) showing an affinity for Elon Musk is akin to signaling conservative values. Is this Gainesville, Florida native secretly based? Or is she trying to get Elon's attention (for baby-making)? Maybe both? Who knows. This does bear monitoring for future developments.


 
Meme of the Week!


This week's honors go to @SirajAHashmi for this very dark meme about Iranian President, Ebrahim Raisi, death via helicopter crash (RIP, BOZO!). Yes, this is mean (to Kobe Bryant), but this is how the internet works when someone famous dies - people mock them using any means at their disposal. Sorry, Kobe, you also died in a helicopter crash, so you're gonna take some posthumous shrapnel.


You may wince, you might not like what this type of meme says about our culture, but you did laugh. As of the writing of this blog, this tweet racked up 1.2M views, over 650 RTs, and over 6.9K Likes (nice). A monster tweet by any measure.


I asked Siraj to provide a comment on his win this week and here's what he shared with me for publication:

What a fucking douchebag. I instantly regret praising him. What a cunt.


 

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9 Comments


Happy Sundress Season!



Like

Another fine collection, gentlemen!

Like

Guest
May 26

Fuck Siraj.

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Guest
May 26
Replying to

Yeah fuck that guy.

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Guest
May 26

Carol?, I thought the wife’s name was Gladdis……

Like
Guest
May 26
Replying to

Just noticed daily star, forget what I said.

Like

Guest
May 24

Really liked that thing about trannies and mental illness. Yeah, being kind gets us in all sorts of trouble. Sometimes the truth has to hurt; is meant to hurt; cannot but hurt. Hurt forces real change and metanoia. Drasanta pathos, pathei mathos ("the experience causes pain, the pain causes wisdom").

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