We've curated our own weekly digest of links from around the internet entitled "Tremendously Intriguing Topical Subjects" to help keep you abreast of very important news! We will deliver T.I.T.S. (coincidental acronym) to your inbox every Friday (if you subscribe to our blog)!
VERY Important MILF Feud of 2023 News!
Folks, , , , War is hell.
It's only been a week since we starting covering the the Most Intriguing Latin Female Feud of 2023 (MILF Feud of 2023) between Salma Hayek and Sofia Vergara and we already have our first casualty - Sofia Vergara's marriage.
Yes it would seem that the Curvaceous Columbian ended her union with human Gigachad, Joe Manganiello, but did not provide details as to why the couple decided to call it quits.
Did Ms. Vergara announce her divorce as a result of The Great MILF Feud? It is impossible to say, but almost certainly not.
Did this seven year marriage end as a result of Flappr's hard-hitting, deep diving, war correspondent coverage? It's certainly possible, but only in a "if I dig this hole in my backyard deep enough, I'll end up in China" type possible.
What we do know is that Sofia Vergara [wore] [a] Cheeky One-Piece Thong Swimsuit in Italy amid Divorce News (an actual headline from People.com).
Fascinating. . . let's investigate.
But that's not all, folks . . . in perhaps what could be considered to be a subtle attempt to sway MILF Feud media coverage, Sofia Vergara Squeez[ed] Her Lemons In Strappy Sundress (an actual headline from TheNerdstash.com).
Hmph. . . that is, indeed, a Breathtaking Bogota Bum Bum; however, while Flappr may be renown for its sound support for Sundress Nationalism, we are also less renown for our journalistic integrity. Accordingly, any attempts by Ms. Vergara to influence our coverage of the MILF Feud were carried out in vein. . . . *ahem* I mean vain.
Meanwhile, all was quiet on the Northern Front, with Salma Hayek posting photos only of her support for the Screen Actor's Guild and a dinner she shared with her mother.
Given the Barranquillan Barrage unleashed by Vergara, it was perhaps a wise move for Hayek to reserve her resources for battles further down the road. While such a strategy may prove prescient in the days, weeks and months to come. . . there is no doubt that the Colombian Cannons of Sofia Vergara overwhelmed the battlefield for the second straight week.
As always, we will continue to monitor The MILF Feud of 2023 for further developments.
Very Important News
DDMTE Update: SIX blogs written about Donna D'Errico posting thirsty photos on Instagram
Donna would've made a great Barbie.
Sydney Sweeney: also would've made a great Barbie.
I mean, , , holy shit, right?
That's a lot of money, but I still can't co-sign Tom Brady dating and/or banging her.
After everything Lindsay Lohan went through in her 20s and 30s (which the media gleefully exploited), I am genuinely happy that she survived, found her way, got married and started a family.
There are plenty of ways for Lohan's story to end, and for a long time. . . baby with a Kuwaiti billionaire would've seemed incredibly optimistic.
Congrats to Lindsay, the world's newest God-Tier-MILF.
Alright, let's investigate the accuracy of this headline. . .
Headline Accuracy Rating: That's an accurate headline. I do wonder what exactly is "liberating and fun" about cooking for her kids in her underwear. Not sure why anyone would feel the need to be liberated while cooking for their offspring - such an endeavor is usually more substance over style.
ALSO - cooking in a swimsuit top seems like a recipe for hot oil splash burned boobs. . . which seems extremely non-liberating and un-fun.
She's very pretty but this underwear cooking for kids is ponderous.
No Context, Beautiful Woman Wearing Sundress:
So I've made my views on twins-banging-twins known on this blog before. It's nice that at least one set of identical twins openly admits that they're morally-corrupted-carbon-copies.
Let it be known that it must have taken whomever edited that video a very long time to censor every frame of these naked boxing boobies. Further proof that your claims that "Flappr is a smut blog" are nothing more than slanderous smears
Alexandra Daddario: was born to play Snow White.
But Disney decided to go with a "diverse" cast.
Meet Laura: Sarcasm Appreciator and Sundress Nationalist!
The Flappr Community is among the greatest ever assembled.
Have to say, there are few things in life that sound less enticing than a nude cruise with 2,300 people. Cruises are already kind of gross when they're occupied by clothed guests, but just imagine rolling up to the buffet line and seeing a dude's furry twig and berries hovering over the prime rib.
I prefer my over-cooked Salisbury steak without pubes, thank you very much!
WHAT HAVE WE BEEN TELLING YOU!?!!? Every single week this summer, Rupert Murdoch-owned media have been pushing some pro-women-who-don't-shave propaganda. In fact, between The NY Post and The Sun, this is the SIXTH straight week they've published a story promoting a hairy beaver agenda.
What is the deal here? Will the media stop at nothing to turn our beautiful-bikini-area-shaven country into the furry-fertile-crescent hellscape of Europe?
This is the place where God-fearing, beaver shearing, Americans must take a stand. Either you say no to Euro-centric feminine grooming standards now, or don't complain when every beach-bunny looks like she has Chewbacca in a leg lock come the summer of 2024.
Ladies, , , it doesn't have to be this way! Nobody is demanding you adhere to the naked mole rat route. All were saying is don't break our American-tradition of hairless pits and legs. Bikini zone? We're just asking for minimum levels of maintenance! Be a good neighbor, trim your hedges, and make sure those boxwoods don't creep beyond the fence line.
Simple as.
It's sexting. Gen Z likes to sext rather than actually engage in live-human-intercourse. Who needs to see a pair of real human female breasts when you can just beg some random girl to send you a picture of them?!?
To be fair, what did we expect from a generation that was raised on cellphones, Instagram ad OnlyFans?
Leave it to the Zoomers think they invented cyber sex.
PLUS: Abby Shapiro is having a boy!
Fun fact - I have made about 10 memes celebrating preggo Abby's . . . virtues . . . but have been unable to bring myself to post them. She seems like a genuinely decent human being and someone who loves being a mom. Abby also already gets a lot of grief online because of her brother, her traditional life-style takes and because she has enormous breasts.
While I cannot promise that I'll never Abby-post ever again, it feels wrong to pile on with booba memes at this time.
Credit to me, I'm a very good person.
Go subscribe to Abby's YouTube Channel, support her work!
Very Important Meme of the Week
This week's honor goes to a meme that's not even a meme. It's a collection of memes that @grandoldmemes created and which were later tweeted by Elon Musk without attribution. This was/is relevant because Musk recently launched a revenue sharing model for Twitter content creators that meet certain account thresholds and/or requirements.
However, not all accounts that otherwise met Twitter's qualifications were allowed to participate in this program, due to content that's not suitable for advertisers (I do not know if @grandoldmemes fits this category or not). Now what is particularly galling to many in the meme-making community is that some people who WERE allowed to monetize their accounts often use memes created by ineligible accounts to boost their own Twitter followings and will now be profiting off the creativity of others.
So, in essence, someone like, say, Benny Johnson, could pilfer a meme made by someone with a demonetized account, post it to his account and make money from the engagement it receives while the original creator receives nothing.
That doesn't seem fair, now does it?
I think that's what @grandoldmemes was getting at here with his response to Elon Musk. He's right to call out Musk for his hypocrisy. If Musk is going to implement a revenue sharing program like this, he needs to make sure that accounts like @grandoldmemes, @midnightmitch, @richard_harambe, @drefanzor, @magills_ and others can profit from their labor. At minimum, he needs to provide people with an actual process by which otherwise eligible accounts can appeal or learn why they are demonetized.
10/10, pay these dudes.
Other Important News
Joseph Zeigler: is a gay democrat and the second IRS whistleblower to come forward against the Biden Crime Family.
Remember in 2002, when the media celebrated a trio of female whistleblowers that sounded the alarm against then-president George W. Bush?
Remember 2016-2021, when the media celebrated people like Alexander Vindman, Miles Taylor and several other people came out against then-president Trump?
Call it a hunch, but, for some reason, I just don't think our media's appetite for whistleblower celebration is going to be quite as ravenous as it was back in those days.
This: happened.
I don't generally like this type of politics, but we exist in an environment where the media refuses to acknowledge, cover and/or not otherwise reframe stories that negatively portray Democrats.
Soo. . . you have to play the game as it stands and I'd bet that many Americans (too many) don't really know the severity of what Hunter Biden did and got away with under his daddy's DOJ. MTG wisely used this as on opportunity to educate the citizenry that Hunter Biden paid women to cross state lines in order to have sex with him (while also doing drugs).
Ron DeSantis: sat down with Jake Tapper for the first hostile interview of his campaign.
You can watch the majority of his interview in the thread of clips embedded above.
I think Ron did well. He has a track record of handling and battering hostile media very well.
DeSantis is no lightweight and he should've been doing more of these interviews from the start of his campaign. We'll see what happens next.
Jon King: is really into Jack Smith's 5-dollar-footlong.
This is "We wish you a Mueller-Christmas" 2.0. This is your media. These people are so unserious and so fucking weird.
I half-thought King was about to whip it out and go full-Toobin on live TV. So, so, strange.
NY Post: ‘Gay Democrat’ who wants ‘to do what is right’ emerges as second IRS Hunter Biden whistleblower
I would imagine that Mr. Zeigler is smart enough to realize that he will not become a national celebrity in the same way other recent whistleblowers have. He must understand that he will not be invited to play swords with Arnold Schwarzenegger or get hired as a contributor at CNN.
To wit - this dude deserves some kudos for putting his balls on the line to come forward and blow the whistle. This is true courageous shit. Let's just hope this decision doesn't fuck his life up too much.
Hollywood In Toto: Woke ‘Barbie’ Drowns In Feminism, Lectures
Greta Gerwig was not going to miss out on an opportunity to hollow out an iconic part of your culture and wear its skin as a trophy.
Save your money, don't see the movie, but make sure to find and recontextualize clips of Ken for your own Right-Wing purposes.
Simple as.
Joe Biden: is awake, we think.
The leader of the free world, everybody.
Entourage is the last mainstream show that accurately depicted male relationships. No, not every friend group is centered around a movie star, but Vinny, E, Drama and Turtle treated each other and talked the way that actual dudes talk.
The show is eminently rebootable and adaptable to the current era (imagine Ari Gold having to deal with Zoomer-interns). The only concern here would be that HBO would only reboot a politically-correct, sanitized, version of Entourage. On Victory the Podcast, Doug Ellin, the show's creator, has promised that he would not allow that happen. I hope HBO gives him a chance to see this through while all the actors still look young enough to pull off a return (they all still do).
National Review: Trump’s Imminent January 6 Indictment
Oh yeah. . . we're doing this again. It's hard to take any of this stuff seriously anymore.
Real banana republic type-shit.
Charles C. W. Cooke / National Review: The First Amendment’s Protection of ‘Hate Speech’ Is Not ‘Despicable’
The one in which Charlie takes down the Arizona Democrat Party for calling a republican legislators defense of free speech an 'absolutely despicable' act.
Democrats didn't used to be this way. The ACLU (which is now, essentially, a progressive activist group), once defended the KKK's right to march in Skokie, Illinois, on First Amendment principles.
That isn't the case now.
I don't reallllly like country music, most of it sounds like a South Park-esque parody of country music to me. I must say, though, this song is pretty good.
Enjoy it while you can, I assume YouTube will be taking the video down within the next few days.
The Washington Free Beacon: COLLUSION? FDA Approves New Alzheimer's Drug Just in Time for Biden Reelection Campaign
Andrew Stiles is a funny dude and the Free Beacon really is an under-appreciated gem.
Sure, but other than skipping deployments and receiving indefinite physical fitness waivers . . . these folks are really just as fit to serve as normal people, right?
Animal Magnetism: Animal's Hump Day News
Make sure you scroll down to read about Hannah Barron, the most adorable catfish noodler on planet Earth. I've stumbled upon Hannah before and she is really quite breathtaking.
Thompson, blog: Elsewhere and Yet Prompt Payment Is Expected
You should really bookmark and make Thompson, blog part of your weekly reading diet.
The Other McCain: Don’t Believe CNBC’s Fake News and Just a Random Grandbaby Video
Sometimes it's just nice to take a moment to enjoy a good, random, grandbaby video.
The Most Libtarded Thing You'll See This Week:
Barack Obama says banning books like 'Gender Queer' (though that book is not banned, just taken out of some school libraries) is the same thing as banning books by Mark Twain and Walt Whitman.
Politics rot your brains.
Important News, BUT Sports
The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: have selected their 2023 squad.
How long before cheerleaders become a thing of the past? I say we've got about 5-10 years left of this thing you liked, but progressives say you are no longer allowed to have any more.
Hideki Matsuyama: is stretching out his lower back.
Summer is a very slow time for sports.
Riley Gaines: launched a new podcast with Outkick.
Give Riley's show a chance.
I like Tua Tagovailoa, I've watched him play for years, I probably would not recognize him if he was walking down the street. . . . so maybe don't worry too much about the "being famous" thing, for now.
You'll thank me one day, Tom. I promise.
Yes . . . those are two healthy looking women. Good for them.
If you're too lazy to read the story, apparently, Howard is being accused of shoving his penis in the mouth of the accuser while a transexual woman performed a sex act on the former number 1 overall draft pick.
Howard, who has previously denied being gay and has children with multiple women, allegedly sent the following messages to his male accuser:
“I jus wanna see ur [eggplant emoji].”
“thinking about that meat,”
“I want it.”
"Now I want you to know I’m not gay or anything. I’m jus alil nasty sometimes."
Very not gay, indeed.
BSO: Bills Jordan Poyer’s Wife Rachel Bush Go Topless In Pool While Flaunting Her Booty In A Tiny Thong
Fascinating, lets rate the literalness of this BSO headline!
BSO Headline Literalness Rating: This is a very literal BSO headline.
Paige Spiranac: wants you to learn proper golf etiquette.
Flappr Blogs
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