Week 7 of the NFL season included bye weeks for 4 high scoring teams: Buffalo, LA Rams, Minnesota, and Philadelphia. That meant 3 of the top 5 wide receivers and 2 of the top 5 quarterbacks were not available in Week 7.
Once again this week, your intrepid correspondent has scoured the depths of Twitter to find pictures to go with the game recaps so you don't have to.
Heading into Week 7, it worked out that the top 5 teams in the league played one of the bottom 5 teams in the standings, with teams 5 & 6 playing each other. Here's what happened in this week's games.
Fugly Slots (@balling_it) vs. M.I.L.F. (Man I Love Football) (@ElderBartleby): The Fugly Slots took the lead after SNF and had the week’s 3rd highest score, led by Joe Burrow’s 39.24 points. Bartleby used big performances on MNF from Justin Fields and Rhamondre Stevenson to take the victory and earn the Week 7 Top Hat. @ElderBartleby topped @balling_it 151.86 – 124.82.
Always shop locally!
Hackensack Cockles (@SteroidRespectr) vs. Italian Defense League (@michcusejac5): The Italians got 28.78 points from Daniel Jones, which probably deserves and award of its own, and earned this weeks closest win. The Cockles got 30.70 points from Austin Ekeler and win the Forgotten Man award for leaving George Pickens’ 15.10 points on the bench, although it would only have made the loss more heartbreaking. @michcusejac5 beats @SteroidRespectr 125.78 – 107.76.
The Steelers deserve a participation trophy for this year.
Penalty Boxers (@ground_miller) vs. Zach Wilson Banged My Mom (@_Miller__Lite_): In a showdown between the Millers, both teams started out slow. The Boxers took the lead Sunday afternoon behind Patrick Mahomes. Miller Lite was hindered by injuries limiting Deebo Samuel and Mark Andrews’ production. @_Miller__Lite_ comes up short against @ground_miller 120.12 – 80.60.
Bad Mans (@Nworb_Yorel) vs. Uncle AC and The Academics (@ywst_ac): Uncle AC had a great week, led by Josh Jacobs’ 35.0 points, to get the win. The Bad Mans took an early lead behind a couple New York Giants, but he didn’t get much help after that. @ywst_ac beats @Nworb_Yorel 114.26 – 87.08.
Uncle AC had Tee Higgins too.
Herbert’s Perverts (@Twi77erSuxDong) vs. Derrick Henry's White Twin (@jonbrooks935): The Perverts took an early lead with Kyler Murray on Thursday and was led overall by rookie Kenneth Walker III. The White Twin had a couple guys on bye and Christian McCaffery didn’t score like normal after being traded to the 49ers. @Twi77erSuxDong won over @jonbrooks935 117.88 – 74.00.
Here's our standings after 7 weeks.