Tipping for Tweets

Whenever Twitter announces a new feature for their platform, there's always a sliver of hope that they will finally add an edit button so you don't have a delete a tweet over a spelling error.

Usually, Twitter doesn't seem interested in improving its platform, but does seem laser focused on making it a more detestable experience for its users. However, this latest update is something people might like.

Yesterday, Twitter announced they are testing a new feature called Tip Jar. Essentially, there will be money icon on your profile and when someone clicks on it - it will provide people with the option of tipping someone for their tweets (using Paypal, Cashapp, Venmo, etc. . .).

Initially, I rolled my eyes at this announcement.

I couldn't imagine a worse way to incentive the awful takes that pollutes this site. The Brooklyn Dad guy is already getting paid by the DNC to tweet out his garbage. Do we really need to inflate the egos of so many morons on this site that are poisoning discourse?

But then, it got me thinking - it would be nice to get paid for my hard work. Now working a minimum-wage job and slaving over a useless college degree isn't glamourous, but'll get me somewhere in this miserable world we live in. However, in the last year, I've had some fun with Twitter. I met some amazing people on here, and it has brought me great joy in dunking on libs and attacking horrible journalists. I feel it could be time to get paid for my work.

Now a problem from this feature was brought up by Rachel Tobac, CEO of SocialProof Security. She noted that when you use PayPal after you receive your receipt from tipping someone, the person you just tipped gets your address. So unless you want that sexy thot you just tipped to know where you live, you may have to be cautious with this.

Unlike most of Twitter's useless features, like Fleets or Twitter Space, this one I will welcome with open arms. I can finally get paid for my spicy tweets and not feel guilty that I'm wasting my life away because of this godawful site.

Now Twitter is still testing this feature, so there aren't many details on how one could sign up for this. When this feature is completely rolled out, please join me in abusing the hell out of this system. Just don't be a stalker and save anyone's addresses; I don't want see any of my followers on Dateline. . .