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Randy's Reviews: The Fast and the Festive, A Fast & Furious Christmas Story

Editor's Note: Flappr wanted to have an ACTUAL author review our first eBook, so we asked (see, begged) @partymanrandy read and review it for us. For some reason (we're guessing pity) he obliged. You should DEFINITELY go buy and support Randy's book "Mediocre Saviors", which is available on Amazon.

Full disclosure: I've only seen the original Fast and Furious movie - and that was when I was 14 - when I went to see Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon with my youth group, but it was sold out or something, I don't remember, so we saw Fast and Furious instead.

But the story-telling is so vivid and adrenaline-packed that I felt like I've known these characters my whole life. I felt like I've been through war with these characters...The War on Christmas, to be precise.

The Fast and the Festive is quite possibly the most high-octane reading experience of my life. It was the kind of book where, when it was written, you just know that every tap of the keyboard was pounded down by a sturdy boner. Every word on the page roars like a monster truck and punches like an even bigger monster truck. Not only is it more action-packed than a Trump rally, it's more romantic than hardcore pornography. It is like NOS for your brain.

I wasn't able to read this book until Christmas was already over, but it was so festive that it retroactively made Christmas 2020 the most jolly in memory. It brings the Nativity to life in a way that Hollywood has never been able to accomplish, and with such painstaking attention to historical detail that it leaves you wondering if maybe, just maybe, this was really how that glorious night really went down.

Without getting into spoilers, the plan of the story's surprise Big Bad is remarkably in character. These libs think they can control everything. But they don't realize that Jesus cannot be canceled. God is ultimately in control. With Trump as His mighty instrument.

Aside from being ruthlessly entertaining, The Fast and the Festive also brings necessary attention to the type of real-life plots Lin Wood has been trying to warn us about. Rarely is there a story that can be fantastical and spell-binding, while at the same time being so true-to-life.

In short: This is the modern Christmas classic that we've all been waiting for.

If you'd like to read The Fast and the Festive yourself, its available for FREE by clicking here.


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