Well folks, he's done it yet again. Perhaps the only news bigger this week than the landmark peace deals between Israel and multiple Arab countries (with more to follow) is that President Trump has single-handedly brought Big Ten football back to the American people. It may be helpful to start at the beginning.
Just over one month ago, due to the Chinese Virus pandemic, the Big Ten presidents voted to cancel fall sports. The only of which that matters being football. This would mean no Michigan, no Wisconsin, no Penn State, no Ohio State, no Michigan State, no Minnesota, no Iowa, no Nebraska. Then a bunch of other shitty programs in blue states like Illinois, Maryland, and Rutgers that no one cares about.
A couple of weeks later your favorite president (kidding but true) sprang into action, as he is wont to do. On August 28th, he fired off his first week about the Big Ten. President Trump wants football back - NOW!
This became a constant drum beat from the president over the following days. Let the kids play!
We cannot be left to only watch Austin Peay vs. Central Arkansas or the Marxist league that plays on Sundays.
By the start of September, the president was on the horn with the commissioner of the Big Ten. That is when things really started gathering steam and rumors started swirling that maybe the schools would look to reverse their vote.
Right around Labor Day it was looking very good that the Big Ten would be voting to kick off their season sometime in October. Trump gave a final little nudge like only he can. Imagine being a fool who ever doubted him on this?
Then yesterday, Wednesday September 16th, the news became official. Big Ten football is back baby! Returning to a gridiron near you on Saturday October 24th.
But of course the libs just cannot handle this great victory by our President. The Big Ten university presidents tried to claim that Trump had nothing to do with the reversal. Wow a bunch of academic clowns that hate Trump and want to give him no credit for anything? I am completely shocked! No one is buying it gentlemen.
Some libs even went completely off the reservation over this decision. Leftist sports journos are among the most miserable creatures on the entire planet but this one from USA Today may take the cake, calling this the darkest day in Big Ten history. A total meltdown...get a grip lady!
But we are not going to let the libs ruin this one. No sirree. There is perhaps nothing more American than a couple of hogmollies from Minnesota and Wisconsin or Ohio and Michigan battling it out in the trenches on a crisp fall Saturday afternoon. President Trump has saved the day once again and may have managed to sweep Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Minnesota in the process. Peace in the Middle East and Big Ten football all in the same week. What more could an American patriot ask for? Promises made, promises kept. Sorry Governors Whitmer, Evers, Wolf, Hogan, and the rest...you libs have been owned yet again. Thank you President Trump!!!
Flappr has two resident Michigan Wolverine enthusiasts, yours truly and the Great Nero, which is why we were especially excited for this story to break. The latter could not be reached for immediate comment. I suspect he is on a bender celebrating the return of Big Ten football like a good Michigan Man. And you know what, even if the Blue lose to those bastards from Ohio State for the 9th straight year that's okay because that just means the best is yet to come.