Minions Are From Mars, Liberals Are from Venus

"Conservative" isn't a word I usually use to describe the minions - that brave troop of men and women who lay siege to Liberals on Twitter each and every day. No, the minions have array of political opinions and ideologies that all coalesce to push one core principle - own the libs. It may not be solely because a minion is a staunch Conservative or Republican, it's mostly because a minion is just NOT a Lib and does not partake in Libdom.



You see, the Lib believes that, without a utopian government, all happiness, fulfillment, love of life, and humor are impossible. They have convinced themselves that the show must not go on until society is perfect *and also* that it can never be perfect, even in theory. Victimization is lifeblood of the Libs, they are addicted to victimhood and will even canablize their own in search of their next fix. In a way, we should pity the Libs and perhaps we do - only our mercy is shown through merciless twitter trolling.



Minions, on the other hand, are convinced that human happiness, fulfillment, and all the rest are totally undetermined by the form or quality of government. Humans have led good lives under every kind of government and in every sort of circumstance. Under Republicans, under Democrats, as aristocrats during prosperity, as serfs of a communist slave state, in good times and in bad. People have also led unfulfilled and unhappy lives in all of those exact same circumstances. We know that any given circumstance can be the occasion either of a good life OR an unhappy life. The power--the actual, real-world, everyday power--resides not in the state or collective or system, but in the person. The state can affect the quality of our lifestyle of course--but not the quality of ourselves.


So onwards the minions go, fighting that good fight to spread the gospel of independence and self-determination, laughing and mocking Libs whenever and wherever they show up. This is a thankless job, but one that must be done to preserve our ability to think for ourselves, blaze our own paths and have a laugh or two along the way - mostly at the expense of Libs.


For reasons that should appear obvious, the Lib cannot share in laughter at the expense of others or at their own expense. For a Lib, mocking someone is to take their life into their own hands - for mocking the wrong person and mistakenly upsetting the hierarchy of victimhood may lead to a self-cancellation. So it should be no shock that, given how much opportunity they have been given to improve - the left still cannot meme. To engage with comedy, one has to be able to look at the world as it is and laugh at it, even if it is horrible - Libs are not allowed such freedom, Libs are not allowed to laugh, even at themselves.


Minions never seize or pounce because they are desperate or afraid--they do it because it is FUN. The apocalypse--as it is in its real horror and pain and destruction for every one of us--is funny. The fact that Twitter wants to ban "wrong think" because they know they can't defeat ideas on their merit is FUNNY. The fact that Libs cannot understand how we can laugh - despite controlling 0 levers of power and getting slapped around by censors, the media, corporate America, universities and basically all of popular culture - is HILARIOUS.


So let's remember that Twitter is a game, that politics in general is a game. That we are all united in that we all find the seat of our meaning elsewhere, somewhere they can't touch it. Find truth, laugh at it, and own it.


Keep the faith. Hold the Line. Own the . . . well you get the idea.

THINGS ARE SO MUCH MORE FUN WHEN YOU COMMENT

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©2020 by Flapper.

Keep the Faith. Hold the Line. Own the Libs.

Mathew Foldi is a Lib