top of page

Happy "Whatever the Fuck You Guys Call It" Day

I have a few rules in my life that I take very seriously, for example, don't wear pajamas to Walmart, (they might think you stole them.) Don't discuss your pay with co-workers, this always ends badly, and DO NOT SAY "HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY" TO A STRANGER.


I personally never say "Happy Mother's Day" to a stranger because you don't know if they are one.


Maybe they don't have kids.


Maybe they don't like kids.


Maybe they are a dude that looks like a lady.


Maybe they can't have children.


Maybe their kids are ne'er do well Antifa protestors or comfortable shoe sky screamers who haven't showered or called home in 6 months.


Well, I have some great news, apparently MOTHERS no longer exist.

Disclaimer: I personally don't give a shit how you choose to live your life, you do you boo boo, is my motto number five.


I have a hypothetical question:


Say there's a couple, who are both transgender, meaning they both identify as the opposite sex (to keep it simple for this exercise in logical thought I am going to pretend for now that the other 268 gender combos do not exist. Also in this scenario, neither of them identifies as a cat, or a dragon, so don't ask, we are also excluding the gender/animal crossover identities as well)


One of them gets pregnant, the one that has a uterus, but now dresses like a dude. The other half of the couple, wears a dress but does not have a uterus.


The uterus bearer is the one who will actually deliver the child, and by the definition above would be the "birthing person," so that makes the non uterus human, what? Because they cant be a birthing person if they don't have the uterus.


What the hell do we do in this situation?


This gal gets me:


Once the child is on the outside, the "birthing" is over, so then who is the Birthing Person? This can now only be a day for uterus bearing humans who are in active labor.


The whole day is shot.


Proponents of inclusivity who are pandering to a very small part of the population (again, live your lives folks, I literally do not care what's in your underwear) will say "we are trying to make everyone feel comfortable and accepted everywhere."


So riddle me this SJW wokescolds - why do I have to stop being me so you can be you?

Why on the one day a year when I get celebrated for bringing my son into this world, and working my ass off to keep him fed and housed and safe all those years, do you have to shit on it?


Why am I reduced to being a BIRTHING PERSON? I am greater than the sum of my parts, and I am a MOTHER. I "identify" as a MOTHER, and that should have no effect on your life whatsoever.


The friendly part of the subversion that is inclusivity, the alleged good intentions that lead to wokeness and guarded language, are just a gateway to the the inherent evil that will, at its apex, exclude more than it includes. This, my friends, is a stepping stone to the realization of a shitty utopian sci fi novel.


I will not be saying "Happy Mother's Day," to strangers again this year, I will also not be saying "Happy Birthing Person's Day," because it's dumb and it makes people who say it sound like assholes and people who hear it uncomfortable as fuck.



You can still be you, whoever you are, use whatever pronouns you want, have your plumbing switched like a contractor's special on a home improvement show, but since I am not YOUR Birthing Person, it is not my job to care about any of that.


And you can't make me. This is my day.









bottom of page